Vacation Planning: Please Comment

So I'm trying to decide where to go for my Christmas vacation. Please send your comments to help inform my decision. Keep in mind that I have only five days. Here are the options, with their strengths and weaknesses:

Option 1: Greece

-strengths: -lots of ruins (I love ruins, I'm a history major)
-warm weather, nice beaches

-weaknesses: -expensive (they have the Euro now, and the flight is the most as well)
-Souvlaki (really a poor man's schwarma)

-wildcard: -hairy Greek women


Option 2: Turkey

-strengths: -Ruins, Hagia Sophia (apparently it's very touch will heal you!)
-Birthplace of the Schwarma (known originally, and in much of Europe as the donner kabob). Indeed, I was very disconcerted to learn that the Schwarma was born not in Lebanon, buut in Turkey. Still, as Arabs will tell you, the Schwarma may have been invented by the Turks, but it was perfected by the Arabs. Still, better than souvlaki. I wonder if all donner kabobs get an asterisk, or are they more legitimate than the McSchwarma.
-Because of my sophomore history tutorial, I know more than any normal person should about the fall of Constantinople. The story is pretty fascinating, involving the great Sultan Mehmet II ordering soldiers to pull boats along the land to get them inside the "Golden Horn" that borders the city.

-weaknesses: Apparently Istanbul is over-rated. Beyond that, it's unclear how much we will be able to see.

-wildcard: Hairy Turkish women

Option 3: Cyprus

-strengths: -very cheap
-only 1 hour flight
-nice beaches?
-natives referred to as Cypriots (I love that word)

-weaknesses: -what is there to do in Cyprus? I know there are ruins, but I don't really know much about them.

-wilcard: -hairy Greek women AND hairy Turkish women (what could be better?)

Please let me know your thoughts, dear readers.